


Stitches

by IdiotofCamelot



Series: The Emrys File [3]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Episode: s05e10 The Kindness of Strangers, F/M, Friendship, Light Angst, Magic Revealed, happens after
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-25
Updated: 2020-02-25
Packaged: 2021-02-28 01:06:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,603
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22895362
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IdiotofCamelot/pseuds/IdiotofCamelot
Summary: Gwen wants to fix a hole in Merlin's shirt like she used to when she wasn't queen. But when she questions Merlin about the origins of the hole, she finds out more than she anticipated.
Relationships: Gwen & Merlin (Merlin), Gwen/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Merlin & Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)
Series: The Emrys File [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1639003
Comments: 8
Kudos: 165





	Stitches

Gwen watched as Merlin served her and Arthur their dinner. It still felt strange to be served rather than to serve. It had been three years since she had married Arthur and become queen, but she still couldn’t quite get used to it. Part of the problem was Merlin. He was still a servant while she was waited on and served and protected.

Merlin couldn’t have the luxury that she now had and that pained her. Seeing her friend work so hard from dawn till dusk made her almost want to be a servant again just so she could help him.

With these thoughts flitting through her mind, she watched as Merlin refilled Arthur’s cup. That’s when she saw it. On the right-side Merlin’s shirt there was a mismatch patch roughly sewn on, presumably a hasty repair.

This brought Gwen back to the times Merlin would come to her when she was still a servant. He would walk into her house, looking like he had been up all night, and ask her if she had time to fix some tear in his shirt or trousers or jacket.

Of course she had time. That was always her answer. Even if she was unusually busy. There was no way she was going to turn down Merlin when he looked dead on his feet.

She always stitched his worn and ripped clothes without a question. He never said how he got the tear or how he burnt the entire front of his shirt. And she never asked. It didn’t feel right for her to intrude into his business if he didn’t offer the information freely.

Merlin hadn’t come to her for mending since she had become queen. This didn’t bother Gwen. But since she was feeling nostalgic, she decided to ask Merlin after dinner if she could mend his shirt.

Almost as if to signal the end of dinner, Gwen heard a knock on the door of their chamber.

“Get the door, Merlin,” Arthur ordered.

Merlin gave Arthur a withering look as he removed the empty serving dishes from the table and then opened the door.

Sir Leon stepped in, giving Merlin a slightly annoyed glance for taking so long before nodding to Gwen and turning to Arthur.

“Sire, there are reports of increased Saxon activity on our eastern boarders.”

“Right,” Arthur sighed, rising from his chair. “Merlin, I hope you can manage cleaning up without me here. Guinevere I’ll be back before you know it.”

Gwen smiled, “I’ll await your return.”

Arthur grinned and left with Sir Leon.

“He’s finally gone,” Merlin muttered as he began to clear the dishes from the table.

“Wait, Merlin, stop!” Gwen said.

Merlin gave Gwen a startled look. “Why? Do you want me to do something else or am I doing something wrong or—?”

“No!” Gwen stood up. “I just—I noticed that your shirt has a patch on it.”

Merlin looked down at the patch. “It’s nothing.”

“Please, Merlin. Just for old times’ sake. Would you let me fix it?”

Merlin blinked. “But you’re the—”

“Don’t say ‘I’m the queen’. I am your friend and I have been that longer than I’ve been queen. Now, please. Let me mend your shirt.”

He looked around the room as if trying to find an exit. “I don’t have anything to change into.”

“Just use this.” Gwen walked over to Arthur’s wardrobe, pulled out on of his shirts, and tossed it to Merlin. He caught it with an amused, but wary expression. “Don’t worry. I won’t be that long.”

Merlin shrugged and stepped behind the screen to change. Gwen, meanwhile, went to her desk and pulled out her old sewing kit which she kept out of habit. When Merlin draped his shirt over the top of the screen, Gwen took it and began to work.

It wasn’t difficult to remove the patch since the stitching wasn’t tied down. When the patch fell into Gwen’s lap, she examined the hole beneath.

Gwen frowned. The hole was circular. Around the frayed edges of the hole there could be seen a dark stain which could only be one thing: blood.

“Merlin,” Gwen called, concern filling her voice. It had been her habit not to ask after the origin of the tear or hole, but the sight of the blood stain was not one to be overlooked. 

Merlin poked his head around the side of the screen. “What?”

“How did you get this?”

Merlin came to where Gwen was sitting on the bed. He looked at the hole in his shirt. He wore an expression of practiced calm.

“Don’t know.”

Gwen gave Merlin a pleading look. “Merlin. You can’t expect me to not ask how you got a hole in your shirt with blood stains around it.”

Merlin opened his mouth. Then he closed it again. He didn’t say anything for a few moments.

“I caught it on one of Arthur’s crossbow bolts when I was skinning the deer he shot.”

It was a lie. Gwen saw it in his eyes, the way he looked at his feet, as if being embarrassed at his mishap with the crossbow bolt. He could lie better than anyone Gwen had known. Even better than Morgana.

“What really happened?” Gwen asked gently. “Where you protecting Arthur?”

Merlin’s eyes resembled those of a cornered animal. He hesitated before responding.

“Y-yes.”

“How did this happen?”

Merlin closed his eyes. Tears sparkled in the corners of his eyes. “I was shot. By a crossbow. Well, a Saxon with a crossbow but—”

“Whoa whoa!! Slow down!” Gwen grabbed his shoulders to stop his trembling. “Saxons? You were attacked by Saxons while hunting?”

“Y-yes,” Merlin breathed. “The Saxons came out of nowhere. Morgana’s men. I-Arthur killed most of them, but the last one got me.”

“Why didn’t Arthur say anything?”

“H-he didn’t want you to worry.”

Gwen thought for a moment. It was plausible. It was more likely that Merlin would have convinced Arthur not to say anything. But there was just one thing wrong with Merlin’s story.

“Merlin. You and Arthur haven’t gone hunting for over a month. The last time you wore this shirt…it was perfectly fine.”

Merlin’s face collapsed. He squirmed out of Gwen’s grip and sat heavily on the bed. His breathing was coming in quick, panicked breaths.

Gwen rushed to his side. “It’s alright, Merlin! You’re okay now. You can tell me what happened.”

Merlin shook his head, tears spilling down his cheeks. “I can’t.”

“You can! You can’t be hurt now. The knights and Arthur—”

“You don’t understand!” Merlin shouted, standing suddenly. “No one ever understands!! Arthur and the knights are the last people who would want to see me if I told you!! I can’t!! Alright?!”

The conversation was starting to worry Gwen. Merlin looked so lost. He was usually a light to keep them all hopeful and happy. But now…he needed someone to be a light for him.

“You don’t have to be alone in this, Merlin,” Gwen said, standing and placing her hand on his arm. “If you tell me, I will try to understand.”

Merlin looked Gwen in the eye. Sorrow and pain were all too evident in his deep blue eyes that it hurt when Gwen looked into them. “If I tell you, we will both be in great danger.”

“Why?”

“Morgana.” The way Merlin said her name made Gwen feel as if he knew more about what was going on than her or even Arthur.

“What about her?”

“She want’s me dead and if she were to know—and if Arthur knew…I can’t tell you, Gwen!! I could get you killed!!”

“I’m sure it’s not that bad,” replied Gwen as she sat down again, now quite shocked.

“It really is!” Merlin started pacing in front of her. “No one can know. If anyone knew…no. They can’t know. Arthur can’t know. If they did…Morgana would find out and come after me and if she kills me…Camelot would fall, Arthur would die, Albion would crumble…”

As Merlin rambled Gwen followed his movements with her eyes, her concern increasing into alarm. Merlin thought Arthur’s fate rested on his shoulders? He thought Morgana wanted him dead? Arthur needed to give Merlin more time off. She would have to bring this up when he—

“…if anyone knew I have magi—”

Gwen was snapped out of her thoughts and back into reality. She stared at Merlin. Merlin stared back at her.

“You…have…magic?” Gwen gasped out, feelings of betrayal, surprise, sorrow, and revelation choking out her breath. 

The tears streaking down Merlin’s cheeks and his ashen face where answer enough. “I—”

He turned to leave, but Gwen leaped up and grabbed his arm. She could feel tears tracing their way down her own cheeks, but she soldiered on.

“Remember what I said?” She gulped. “‘I will try to understand.’ Tell me, Merlin. Why do you have magic?”

Merlin just stared at her, his face pale and damp from tears. “I-I was b-born with it.”

Gwen frowned, confused and hopeful. “Is that possible?”

“Apparently,” Merlin said with a weak attempt at a laugh.

Just then, the door opened and Arthur walked in, a thoughtful expression on his face.

Gwen exchanged a glance with Merlin. He looked terrified, but oddly calm and resigned.

Arthur caught sight of them.

“What on earth is going on?” he said as he walked closer. “Merlin, why are you wearing my shirt?”

“Well, you see—” Gwen began, but Merlin cut her off.

“Arthur, there’s something I need to tell you. Something I should’ve told you ten years ago.”


End file.
